The Mischievous Mommy

My dear, oblivious finance was under the assumption that I would be too sick to prank him this year. Which means I absolutely had to.
My very reputation and his secret fear of me, that I have worked so hard to establish, depended on it.

That being said, I spared him from some of the more extreme pranks I wanted to pull and went with a few smaller, more subtle ones to take the edge off the day.

The Basketcase Scenario is what I like to call the phenomenon that happens come winter. It is made up of a simple equation that when certain inevitable situations align, chaos ensues.

It all begins to happen when the cold weather arrives. First snow is absolutely stunning and there is magic in the toddler's eyes as mother and child lightheartedly skip down the street breathing in the fresh, crisp air. The loving mother understands the importance of her child getting fresh air and carefully balances their time with outside play and planning wonderful crafts and indoor activities for the rest of the day.

Three weeks later.

Mother spends 30 minutes trying to lasso her naked child, who refuses to wear an ounce of clothing, into 3 layers of what the toddler has deemed their mortal enemy. Mother takes several shots of espresso, gives herself a pep talk and carefully corners toddler while using TV as distraction and in a whirl of clothing and limbs child is, somewhat, successfully dressed. (Who cares if pants are on backwards or shoes are on the wrong feet, at least it is on!)  If said toddler is potty trained than this is without a doubt the moment they decide it's toilet time, this is called Murphy's law. The pair heads outdoors into the -20 degree weather for healthy "outdoor" play while mother struggles not to curse out loud about how freaking cold it is. Child seems oblivious.

1 Month later.

Mother spends 10 minutes trying to lasso naked child, gives up. Puts out a breakfast spread for her toddler, drags a blanket from the bedroom and attempts to hibernate on floor beside toddler happily eating away. This method works for 10 minutes until toddler has eaten their full and realizes mommy is pretending to sleep and it is their calling in life to prevent that from ever happening. Ever.
Mother takes a glance at the 3 feet of snow outside and back to her naked child and knows today will be the dreaded indoor day. One full day of trying to keep a toddler completely entertained with indoor activities without losing your mind. If one has an accessible backyard this stage can be delayed, however living in an apartment speeds up the timeline to insanity.

This is the Basketcase Scenario, it creeps up on you slowly but when it arrives... you will know.

Now, as crafty as I can be with Eve there are only so many things we can do before she gets bored and decides that her new stool trick is much more entertaining.

The stool trick you might ask? O, why that is when she waits for my back to be turned for even just a minute, finds any stool or chair to climb and destroys/eats/smears anything she can find. After the Vaporub incident of last week and making friends with the poison control nurse we are yet again child proofing our house. The entire house.

(On a very serious note, Vaporub can be DEADLY if a toddler ingests it. It is one of the last things I had ever suspected could be THAT dangerous, but please make sure it is locked far away from their reach. All it takes is as little as 1 Teaspoon to be ingested and it can lead your child to go into seizures, coma and even death within 15 minutes to an hour. If you ever suspect your child as gotten into it take them to the hospital immediately. Thank God, Eve just decided to use it as lip chap and only licked a little off her lips.)

Now that I find myself in this Basketcase Scenario I have decided to go on a mission to find as many indoor activities and crafts that will occupy Eve all while expanding her imagination and activity levels. The TV and IPad are both tempting since I know she will be more than happy with those options, but I also know it is my duty as her mother to give her the opportunity to grow. Not to necessarily always be the one teaching her, but to provide her the tools so she can teach herself.

I will do my best to blog and share each project we journey through, whether it be our collaborations, crafts or DIY's. Some will be small projects and others much bigger, but as long as the end result is Eve's imagination being expanded and my sanity being maintained then I will call it a success!

Each project will focus on providing a foundation for the child to build and grow from, as well as one that keeps them busy long enough for you to have some priceless mommy time. (There is no shame in admitting that, we all covet those moments and should find no guilt in not hovering 24 / 7)

Maybe you can even go to the bathroom without an audience for once...

Only 6 more months until summer.